Gird your loins, thirsty young academics: with “Vampire Academy” out Friday (February 7) in theaters everywhere, you’re about to walk into the hallowed halls of St. Vladimir’s Academy for aspiring bloodsuckers.
It’s a prestigious institution where the only thing finer than its education is the student body itself — one made up of various species of vampire and/or vampire hybrid. But if you’re not an expert at spotting a Strigoi at up to 100 yards, then you’ll want to take a run through this study sheet, designed to ease your transition into this academy of fangs and help you figure out where your favorite vamps fit into the “Vampire Academy” world.
If The Vampire Is Tall, Fair And Thin…
Congratulations! You’ve just encountered a member of the beautiful (and sometimes royal) Moroi. Blessed with supernatural gifts including the power of compulsion, they can usually be found in the company of a Dhampir protector and BFF. Though the Moroi need blood to survive, they’re not, like, y’know, jerks about it — and their bites comes with a certain euphoric high that leave the blood donor feeling just delightful. So if your favorite sylphlike vamp is looking a little peaked, don’t hesitate to offer up your own neck for the taking.
If The Vampire Doesn’t Drink The Red Stuff…
You’re probably looking at a Dhampir, born of a half-human, half-vampire bloodline. Though they’re powerful fighters, particularly on behalf of the individual Moroi it’s their duty to protect, Dhampirs don’t have the otherworldly abilities of a full-blooded vampire.
If The Vampire Has Red Eyes And A Hungry Look…
Run like the dickens, my friend, because you’re about to be bitten by an angry Strigoi! The Strigoi — or Strigs, in St. Vlad’s vernacular— are vamps gone bad, with serious strength, violent tendencies, and a raging hunger that makes them yearn for blood. They prefer to sink their teeth into a Moroi, but in a pinch, any juicy human will do.
And If The Vampire Is Covered In Glitter…
Either a wayward Cullen family member has wandered unbeknownst onto the set, or you’ve taken a wrong turn somewhere and ended up in a rerun screening of “Twilight,” because the one thing that “Vampire Academy” vampires don’t do is sparkle.
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