Photos fade, yearbooks yellow and graduation caps wind up casualties to untimely basement flooding. But as far as anyone’s high school days are concerned, the memories of great parties are forever.
On Tuesday night’s “Awkward” episode, Jenna, Tamara and the gang at Palos Hills gathered for their umpteenth celebration since sophomore year and, predictably, there was romance (Sadie and Sergio), a bit of drama (Tamara‘s introduction of the dude database) and some classic redemption (Matty McKibben‘s burning of the PHHS phonebook). In short, it covered the bases that any requisite teenage get-together should (eat your heart out, “Can’t Hardly Wait“!).
But how did it compare to the celebrations that came before?
Below is a ranked list of every party — yes, every single one — Palos Hills’ senior class has thrown (except for dances and school-sanctioned events…we’re not machines!). Check out all the past bashes, tell us if you agree with where they’ve landed and watch the next “Awkward” episode Tuesday night at 10/9c!
13. A Night Of Ecstasy
A threesome? With Collin and Angelique? After being roofied? Uhh…pass…
12. Surprise…?
This non-shindig was over before it began. Don’t forget your party favors beside the door!
11. Tamara’s Big Blowout
T aimed to make her soiree one to remember, but she had a more terrible, horrible, no good, very bad experience than Alexander.
10. Welcome to SCU
Tamara had a blast with her potential new sorority sisters while scouting colleges, but it came at the expense of her interview. Hungover much?
9. New Year’s Eve at Matty’s
Jenna found herself stuck between a rock and a hard place (or, more accurately, between Matty and Jake), but at least she finally resolved to confront her mother about the Carefrontation letter.
8. Hamilton House Rager ft. Aunt Ally
Sure, it was entertaining as hell to watch Jenna let loose, but it came at the expense of her close friendship with Tamara.
7. Matty’s Pre-Summer Kickoff
Jenna landed an official boyfriend, T got her dream Parisian vacation and Ricky Schwartz got a makeout buddy in CLARK?!
6. Black Hearts Party
Tamara peed her pants. Terrible? Yes. Entertaining? Obviously.
5. Costume Bash at Angelique’s
Somehow, Jenna’s rumored suicide made her the hit of the party, and she got attention Palos Hills students had never offered.
4. St. Matty’s Day Party
After icing out her friends and sinking into a drug haze, Jenna finally made it out of the fog. You know, before kissing Jake…
3. Auld Lang Party
When kids party with adults, nothing can go wrong. Except when someone’s dad hooks up with a male stripper.
2. Ricky Schwartz’s Memorial Kegger
What better way to honor your dead friend than malign him while enjoying an off-brand IPA?
1. Lissa’s Kickback
Tamara got the red-cup photo of her dreams, Jenna made some headway with Matty and, may we never forget, Lissa said “behymen.” It was the first “Awkward” party, and as far as we’re concerned, the best.
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