Charlie Sheen is all twisted up after being allegedly shot down for a Rihanna meet-and-greet.

On Wednesday (May 21) Sheen took his girlfriend out for a celebratory birthday dinner, incidentally finding themselves in Rihanna’s presence at the restaurant. When Sheen sent a request to Rih Rih’s table for an introduction, the “Talk That Talk” singer denied, saying there were too many paparazzi outside.

Like any rational person would, Sheen took to Twitter to express his inconsolable disturbances about the situation.

“No biggie for me; it would have been 84 interminable seconds of chugging Draino and ‘please kill me now’ that I’d never get back,” Sheen wrote. “My Gal, however, was NOT OK with it. Nice impression you left behind, Bday or not. Sorry we’re not KOOL enough to warrant a blessing from the Princess. (or in this case the Village idiot).”

Sheen humble-bragged about his personal dedication to taking time out for fans, before firing shots at Rihanna’s new ‘do.

“Halloween isn’t for a while, but good on you for testing out your costume in public,” he wrote, adding “I’m guessing you needed those precious 84 seconds to situate that bad wig before you left the restaurant.”

In the end, Sheen only wanted to give Rih some sage advice.

“If ya don’t wanna get bothered DONT LEAVE YOUR HOUSE!and if this “Prison of Fame” is soooooooo unnerving and difficult, then QUIT, junior!”

Rihanna responded lightly to Sheen’s shots, reeling back her true sentiments.

Jessica Hyndman

In a new Instagram plug for his upcoming film “Adderall Diaries,” James Franco isn’t leaving much to the imagination.

Specifically, the actor went going “SELFIEMADNESS”-style, pulling his underwear down just a little too low, and leaving us with a hint of um, pubic, action. No one wants to see that, James. No one.

This isn’t the first time Franco has dared to push the boundaries of Instagram’s nudity policies though. The “Of Mice and Men” star shared this gem with followers on May 2 before quickly deleting it:

You’re moving too fast for us, James. The world isn’t ready for that.

Jessica Hyndman

Mother Monster took some time after her ARTPOP Ball tour stop in St. Paul, Minnesota, to touch a few young lives at the Gillette Children’s Hospital on Wednesday (May 21).

With Haus monster Emma in tow, Gaga spent one-on-one time and snapped a few selfies with smiling patients.

According to Kare11, Gillette staff were notified just hours before that the singer would be making an appearance at the facility.

The hospital said Gaga “was a true inspiration tonight when she stopped by to visit.”

Jessica Hyndman

In today’s “WTF” world news, Miley Cyrus has posted selfies that I will never, ever unsee. Someone is having a little too much fun in the tub.

Yes, Miley, you’re a “freakkkk.” You win.

I’m pretty sure that pineapple is in the original photo. Why are you bathing with a pineapple, Miley? That cannot be good for your exposed delicate areas.

You know what, nevermind the pineapple. Sleep is overrated.

Jessica Hyndman

The 2014 Cannes Film Festival opened Wednesday (May 14) with a glittering red carpet premiere of “Grace of Monaco.” The Grace Kelly biopic brought out early arrivals from celebrities Zoe Saldana, Kendall Jenner, Karlie Kloss and more. Check out the ladies’ stunning attire:

Nicole Kidman and Tim Roth

Blake Lively

Karlie Kloss

Kendall Jenner

Zoe Saldana

Adele Exarchopoulos

Jessica Hyndman

Macklemore just made the “best decision” of his life.

Look at his new furry baby!

This blue-eyed beauty is named Cairo, and we’re already obsessed. Unfortunately, this is the only photo released thus far.

Hey Macklemore, NEED MOAR PHOTOS PLZ!

Jessica Hyndman

World, meet Hazel!

John Krasinski took to Twitter today (May 13) to introduce he and Emily Blunt’s adorable baby girl. He also used the moment to help spread the #NoKidsPolicy movement, encouraging paparazzi and media to steer clear of children and let the parents do the sharing.

Complete with pink Ralph Lauren Polo pjs and a yellow binky, this little nugget is the cutest thing to happen online today. Just look at those big, curious eyes!

Which parent do you think she resembles more? We see Emily’s eyes and John’s nose.

Jessica Hyndman

… Baby One More Time set the scene for a late-’90s teen-pop revival, with Britney Spears at the forefront. Her record spoke to a myriad of teenage romance issues, ranging from can’t-sleep crushes to the harsh realities of a first breakup. With a powerhouse fame-maker like Max Martin at her side, Brit was clearly destined for Madonna-esque super-stardom. She was bound to be famous, y’all!

Spears’ sophomore album, Oops! … I Did It Again, took an edgier approach than her bubblegum-pop debut. Spears began hinting at the struggles of fame and early media criticism (you’ve gotta remember that ”Sometimes” video scandal where everyone accused her of getting a boob job at 17 years old?). The pop star also matured lyrically, going from the little girl in love to an independent woman who wasn’t afraid to play games. 

Britney pushed Spears’ subtly sexual image into overdrive. At this point, she was pretty much determined to let everyone know, ”I’m a big girl now.” Fewer clothes, more sass. The urban-influenced album included her get-off-my-back hit ”Overprotected,” an edgy cover oan Jett’s “I Love Rock N’ Roll” and her sexy, sweaty dance smash “Slave 4 U.” We got it, Brit. You’re all grown up.

In The Zone was fueled by a public breakup with her love of three years, Justin Timberlake. Britney was a free woman and threw her energy and focus into a hugely successful album, featuring a hit with her idol, Madonna’ a “self exploration” track; a good-girl response to Timberlake’s “Cry Me A River”; and the highly ...

Aaand, he’s back.

Shia LaBeouf has returned to Twitter after months of silence. Following his three-week long “I AM NOT FAMOUS ANYMORE” stream, LaBeouf apologized for the last time and crawled into a social-media-hibernation. The recluse only appeared once more to post a quippy “Out of Office” memo and leave his followers an email address contact.

However, Wednesday (May 7), the recluse actor reclaimed his social spotlight with a cryptic message:

Let’s break this down and see what Shia is getting at:

A Noun And Two Verbs
With these three definitions, maybe he’s telling us that he’s going to start using his Twitter account as a new-aged dictionary? Word of the day, anyone?

‘To Post Vitriolic Electronic Messages’
In Internet terms, the word “flame” is used to describe the action of sending an abusive message via email. Since Shia’s last post included an contact address, perhaps he’s become a victim to flaming over the last few weeks?

‘To Burst Forth With Strong Emotion’
Maybe he’s just trying to tell us how he feels. The third definition describes intense, often angry, emotions. The actor could certainly be experiencing some flaming feelings.

ALL CAPS
Shia capitalized three words in his message: FLAME, ELECTRONIC, and EMOTION. This could determine the most valuable pieces of his code. At first bat, he’s feeling angry over some emails. Or, maybe Shia is preparing to spewing them forth himself. Or maybe it’ll be the title of his debut album or something.

Pants On Fire
In the accompanying photo, a pair of pants burn on grill. Liar, liar, ...

Lee Marshall, the booming basso profondo voice behind Tony the Tiger, is dead at 64. The voice actor’s son confirmed to Huffington Post the cause of death was esophageal cancer.

Marshall first earned his stripes in 1999, lending his voice to the Kellogg’s character in assistance to Thurl Ravenscroft. Ravenscroft, who had voiced the character since 1952, began experiencing vocal issues. Marshall took over full-time in 2005.

There’s no word yet on who will take over the voice of cereal’s most beloved and well-known mascot, but the search is on. John Sheehy, of Chicago’s Leo Burnett ad agency, spoke with CBS about how they will approach it.

“There’s a lot of voiceover talent, but there’s that certain timber that comes with the ‘They’re GR-R-REAT’ and that’s hard to capture,” Sheehy said. “It’s really looking for that tone of voice.”

Grab yourself an oversized bowl, pour in sugar-coated blanket of comfort and let’s remember Tony the Tiger, circa 1999-2005.

Wakeboarding Tony:

Hockey Goalie Tony:

High-Diving Tony:

Killing-It-At-The-Gym Tony:

Basketball Star Tony:

“We Are Tigers” Chant:

Jessica Hyndman