This news is not alright, alright, alright.

The upcoming “Magic Mike” sequel, titled “Magic Mike XXL,” will see the return of several fan-favorites from the first film, including Channing Tatum, Matt Bomer and Joe Manganiello. Guess who isn’t coming back? Matthew McConaughey. The Oscar-winning actor, who played loquacious Xquisite owner Dallas, is not returning for the sequel, according to director Greg Jacobs.

Perhaps Dallas’ absence has something to do with the plot of “Magic Mike XXL,” which sounds like it could have been called “Magic Mike on Wheels.”

“It’s a road trip movie,” Jacobs tells The Playlist, “and put it this way, it’s different enough that once you see it you’ll understand why we made a sequel. No one will be accusing us of making the same movie twice.”

Indeed we won’t, because, no McConaughey, which means, no more of this:

It’s a dark day in Dallas.

“Magic Mike XXL” opens on July 1.

Josh Wigler

Likes pizza, punch and pie. Dislikes the Chitauri.

@roundhoward

Marvel’s “Agent Carter,” starring Hayley Atwell as “Captain America” leading lady Peggy Carter, just added a big-name character to its cast, connecting the show to the “Avengers” franchise in some very interesting ways.

According to Marvel.com, James D’Arcy (“Cloud Atlas”) has joined the cast of “Agent Carter” as Edwin Jarvis. Longtime Marvel readers know Jarvis as the Stark family butler, and a reliable caretaker of the Avengers. (For the uninitiated, think of it this way: Jarvis is to Iron Man as Alfred is to Batman.)

Described by Marvel.com as “Howard Stark’s butler and an unexpected ally to Peggy Carter,” Jarvis’ involvement in “Agent Carter” all but confirms that Howard himself will appear on the show. Marvel has yet to make that news official, but, come on. This train isn’t moving without Dominic Cooper on board, at least as a guest star.

Here’s another idea worth chewing on. In the Marvel movies, Tony Stark relies on an A.I. system called J.A.R.V.I.S., voiced by Paul Bettany, the same man who will play avenging android Vision in “Avengers: Age of Ultron.” It’s long been assumed that Vision’s existence will owe no small part to the J.A.R.V.I.S. system; why else cast Bettany in the role?

Now, we know that there’s a Jarvis predating J.A.R.V.I.S. — but he’s not played by Bettany. Could that mean multiple Jarvises? Will the Edwin Jarvis of “Agent Carter” have a son, one who looks like a young Paul Bettany, someone who could grow up to become Tony Stark’s pal, and ...

When Bryan Cranston knocks, he knocks it right out of the park.

The four-time “Breaking Bad” Emmy-winning actor takes the mound, steps up to the plate, commentates from the skybox, and even dances like a ballerina, in an all-new one-man stage play centered on the great American pastime: Baseball. Of course, it’s not really a one-man stage play; it’s an elaborate commercial for TBS’ upcoming Major League Baseball postseason coverage.

“Heisenberg” and “home run” already belonged in the same sentence, but now, it takes on new meaning. There is literally nothing Cranston can’t do, no position he can’t play — the ultimate utility player.

Play ball, Bryan. Play ball.

Josh Wigler

Likes pizza, punch and pie. Dislikes the Chitauri.

@roundhoward

WARNING: Spoilers Ahead!

The Jury’s out on Jackson Teller.

On the latest episode of “Sons of Anarchy,” Jax’s vengeance quest against the Lin Triad exploded in an unexpected way. In killing and framing two seemingly arbitrary thugs for an assault on the Triad’s business, it appears that Jax actually killed the loved one of a very close ally. There are few things more dangerous than a friend turned enemy, especially one who knows everything about your elaborate plan to avenge your deceased wife.

Here are some of the biggest questions that emerged from “Toil and Till.”

1. Is Jax Taking This Vengeance Thing Too Far?

Short answer: YUP. In “Toil and Till,” Jax tells SOA’s Indian Hills chapter President Jury that he intends to weaken Henry Lin’s alliances, become his only friend, then reveal himself as Lin’s betrayer, before killing everyone Lin holds dear, then finally Lin himself.

It’s an elaborate plan, motivated by little more than vengeance — wrongfully placed vengeance, at that. Lin did not kill Tara; Gemma did. Jax has no idea who his true enemy really is, and his misguided, visionless vengeance quest will drag the whole club to Hell with him.

Related: “Sons Of Anarchy”: All The Shocking Moments From “Toil And Till”

2. What Do We Think Of August Marks’ Advice?

The newly anointed King of Guns tells Jax that if there’s one lesson he learned from Damon Pope, it’s that patience solves all problems, both in business and on the streets. “Clarity settles all scores,” he ...

WARNING: Spoilers Ahead!

Hell hath no fury like a Charming prince scorned.

On the latest episode of “Sons of Anarchy,” Jackson “Jax” Teller finally revealed exactly what he’s aiming for in his vendetta against the Lin Triad — the group he believes responsible for the death of his wife Tara, even though he’s dead wrong. In fact, it’s his mother, Gemma, that plunged a carving fork in the back of Tara’s head. But who needs the truth when there are rival gangsters to blame?

After executing Tara’s “murderer” to the tune of “Bohemian Rhapsody” last week, Jax’s vengeance quest got even bloodier and more complicated this week. Here’s what you need to know about the latest episode, “Toil and Till.”

RELATED: Seven Questions About the “Sons of Anarchy” Season Premiere

What’s the Plan of Action, Jackson?

If he didn’t make it clear by murdering a member of the Triad in the season premiere, Jax Teller blames the Lin Triad for Tara’s death. As such, he’s going to dedicate every resource at his disposal to making Henry Lin’s life a living hell.

Here’s Jax’s plan, as outlined to SOA Indian Hills leader Jury: Jax plans to weaken Lin’s organization, wait until he’s all out of allies, and then extend a helping hand. Once Jax has Lin’s total trust, he’ll reveal himself as Lin’s tormentor. Then, he’ll ask Lin to point to the one person he wants spared from Jax’s wrath. Jax will then kill that person, followed by everyone else Lin cares about.

“I’ll ...

You wouldn’t like Ben Affleck when he’s angry. Unless you like Batman, in which case, you might like angry Affleck.

The Oscar-winning actor and filmmaker is the latest man to bring the Dark Knight to life, taking over the cape and cowl from Christian Bale, and hitting the battlefield opposite Henry Cavill’s Man of Steel in “Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice.” With the film still more than a year away from release, we won’t know exactly what Affleck has in mind for his interpretation of Bruce Wayne until opening day. But in an interview with UK paper The Sunday Times (via Dark Horizons), Affleck opened up on at least one aspect of his Batman: He’s an angry, angry man.

“I think it’s a necessity, historically, in the tradition of these films,” he said. “For me, anger is so deeply buried and contained that when it does kind of come out, it comes out in stronger bursts.”

Affleck continued by describing his own relationship with anger, saying that he doesn’t have “a berserker Wolverine rage” inside of him, but he does have a tendency to let anger build and build until it boils over.

“I tend to be respectful, polite, get along, put up with, put up with, put up with… then, when it finally emerges, it’s not something I have a ton of control over,” he said. “By the way, that’s a character flaw, I think. I should sit down and say, ‘Listen, I just want to let ...

Matt Damon and Jason Bourne parted ways in 2007. Almost ten years later, the Oscar winner and his super-spy alter-ego could join forces again.

Deadline reports that Damon and his “The Bourne Supremacy” and “The Bourne Ultimatum” director Paul Greengrass are reuniting for their third “Bourne” collaboration, and the fifth movie in the “Bourne” franchise overall. Latino Review first reported the possible reunion in June.

According to Deadline’s update, the Damon-Greengrass return to “Bourne” will hit theaters as soon as July 15, 2016, the release date that currently belongs to the “Bourne Legacy” sequel, starring Jeremy Renner as Aaron Cross. Like Bourne, Cross is a highly-trained spy, marked for death and forced on the run. His story took place in the same universe as the original “Bourne” trilogy, but veered off in a new direction to keep the Jason Bourne of it all in its own bubble.

Now, it sounds like Universal wants to get in on the “shared universe” idea that so many other studios are exploring — the Marvel Cinematic Universe, Fox’s “X-Men” franchise, and Warner Bros.’ DC Comics properties, just to name a few. Deadline notes that while Universal wants Damon’s new “Bourne” in time for 2016, the studio still plans to follow up “Bourne Legacy” with another Aaron Cross adventure. Could these two threads collide in a big “Bourne” beatdown?

Until official confirmation from Universal, Damon and Greengrass comes down the line, keep your expectations in check — but ...

You’ve seen the story of Pat and Tiffany. But what about George and Serena?

In 2012, Jennifer Lawrence and Bradley Cooper collaborated on “Silver Linings Playbook,” the David O. Russell drama that earned Lawrence her first Academy Award. That same year, Lawrence and Cooper teamed together for a lesser-known project: “Serena,” a period piece set in North Carolina during the Great Depression, following husband and wife George and Serena Pemberton’s efforts to survive and thrive in a crumbling world.

After years on the shelf, the Susanne Bier-directed drama has resurfaced with a brand new trailer, via The Film Stage. Check it out:

There’s no U.S. release date yet for “Serena,” but it’s due out in the U.K. on October 24.

What do you think of the first “Serena” trailer?

Josh Wigler

Likes pizza, punch and pie. Dislikes the Chitauri.

@roundhoward

In a little less than two years, “X-Men: Apocalypse” will arrive, bringing us our next adventure featuring James McAvoy‘s Charles Xavier and Michael Fassbender‘s Magneto. But even now, we already know about one of the film’s most major casualties: Xavier’s hair.

Speaking with the Huffington Post, McAvoy made the tragic revelation about “Apocalypse”: “I think I’m losing my hair, finally.”

Frankly, Xavier losing his hair certainly took long enough. In “X-Men: First Class,” McAvoy’s Xavier was out of his wheelchair for nearly the entire film, until suffering a crippling gunshot wound in the final climactic scene. Throughout this past year’s “Days of Future Past,” Xavier was able to walk around thanks to a power-suppressant; not only that, he grew his hair out to 1970s appropriate hippy length.

But based on the sound of things, “Apocalypse” will bring McAvoy’s Xavier closer to the version that fans know from the comics, and from the Patrick Stewart version of the character. Beyond losing his hair and returning to the chair, there’s not much that McAvoy can reveal about the 1980s-set “Apocalypse,” but plenty that he can speculate on.

“It feels fairly global, if we’re talking about Apocalypse,” he teased. “Maybe it’s just the character’s name, but I think the nature of the movie is going to be fairly apocalyptic as well.”

“X-Men: Apocalypse” hits theaters on May 27, 2016.

Josh Wigler

Likes pizza, punch and pie. Dislikes the Chitauri.

@roundhoward

Love and marriage. Horses and carriages. Classic TV shows and modern day spinoffs.

These are the peanut butter and chocolate of our times, as it appears that every sitcom from the 1980s and 90s is getting an update in some way, shape or form. First, we caught wind of the return of “Full House.” Just last week, we saw the unauthorized “Saved by the Bell” Lifetime movie. Now, add another to the pile: a “Married … With Children” reboot.

E! News reports that Sony Pictures Television is shopping around a pitch for a new “Married … With Children” series, this time focusing on Bud Bundy, the David Faustino character, presumably as a grown-up with marital and parental headaches of his own. No word on which other cast members might be involved, but both Christina Applegate and Katey Sagal weighed in on the rumors of a reunion, during their get-together at the Hollywood Walk of Fame earlier this week.

“We’re going to do something with Dave maybe. I don’t know if it will be in character,” Applegate told E! News. “But I don’t really know. I don’t know what that’s going to be. I don’t know if I’m allowed to speak on that at all. So I should probably stop talking about it right now!”

“We’ve talked about [a reunion] every year, but then there are so many pieces that have to be in alignment that for some reason it never happens,” added Sagal. “But we love each other. ...