November 16, 2024

Crowning A Bearded Drag Queen Was The Least Shocking Thing At Eurovision 2014

The annual Eurovision song contest is weird. Like, supremely, unbelievably, too-odd-for-words weird.

Like, this band won in 2006.

For real.

And these grannies were in it to win it in 2012.

But this year’s contest made serious headlines when what was expected to be the tense song battle between the Russian and Ukranian entrants took a back seat to Conchita Wurst, a 25-year-old drag queen with a well-manicured 5 o’clock shadow from Austria. Conchita (the onstage drag persona of Thomas Neuwirth) crushed the competition with her song “Rise Like a Phoenix,” which chronicled her journey from a closeted young boy in a mountain village to a glamorous worldwide superstar overnight.

But here’s the thing, while the NFL’s still fighting against bias when it comes to its first openly gay draftee, Michael Sam, the glam, elegant Conchita made headlines, but wasn’t even the most surprising entry into this year’s finals. So, here are a few of our favorite Eurovision eye-poppers:

1. There Was Pollaponk From Iceland
Pollaponk

2. Romania’s Ovi And His Magic Circular Keyboard
Ovi

3. And This Duo, Who Were Conjoined At The Ponytail
Anastasia and Maria

4. Luckily, The Ukraine Brought Their Hamster Wheel
Mariya Yarmechuk of the Ukraine

5. What, Exactly, Does An Electrified Butter Churn Sound Like?
A Polish dancer performs with Donatan & Cleo

6. This Dude’s Hair, Seriously, Nice Work
Lorent Idir of France's Twin Twin

About the author  ⁄ Gil Kaufman

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