In last night’s fourth season premiere of “New Girl,” “The Last Wedding,” the gang tried (mostly in vain) to hook up at the nuptials of some unnamed couple.
Most in vain, in more ways than one, were the attempts of Coach (Damon Wayans Jr.), who, as it turned out, had already charmed several of the woman present at the celebrations, never to be heard from again. Coach got an earful last night from his spurned conquests, and audiences got the pleasure of hearing the women’s critiques.
Presented, for your consideration, all the reasons Coach didn’t call back or measure up (according to the women he didn’t call).
1. So scared of intimacy
2. Hasn’t forgiven her
3. Arrogant
4. Sexist
5. Stole your phone charger
6. Conceited
7. Liar
8. Not in “The Best Man Holiday”
“New Girl” airs Tuesdays at 9 p.m. on Fox.
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