High school can, at times, be a dark chasm of awfulness — so why not imagine that you go to school with all of your favorite pop stars to alleviate some of the suck? You know, in lieu of all those kids you’ve known since you were just a drooling babe.
We took a look at some of the tried and true high school personality types, studying their ways and customs until we settled upon their celebrity equivalents. Check out your high school class — in pop stars — down yonder.
1. The Goth Kid
Cooler than you, wiser than her years — your local Goth Kid is probably a lot like Lorde. In order to bond with him/her, it’s not enough to just look the part (although purple lips are a plus). Drop some references to “The Castle of Otranto” and The Cramps and start penning your own brooding poetry and you might have a chance at breaking into his/her black (but bruised heart).
2. The Nice Cheerleader
There’s always that one popular girl — you know the one. She’s popular because she’s actually nice to everyone, not just because her face looks like it’s been crafted from spun sugar and marzipan. As Taylor Swift is undoubtedly the famous version of said girl, it’s likely pretty easy to become friends with her high school equivalent — you might be one of many, however, as she’s pretty liberal with the BFF title.
3. The Theatre Kid (With An ‘E’)
You know that kid who wears costumes to school with glorious abandon and is frequently found leaping through the halls like a happy puppy, busting out Shakespearian monologues in tap shoes and a smile? Doesn’t s/he remind you — more than a bit — of Katy Perry? The lady is all mugs and winks — and then there’s that “Birthday” video. To chill with Katy’s HS equivalent, be ready to play — and play hard. Chug coffee and mainline sugar in order to keep up.
4. The Sk8er Boi
Everyone loves a skateboard-toting bad boy, which is why your average high school sk8er usually has a flock of adoring fans watching his every ollie — and Justin Bieber has so many Beliebers. Watch out if you’re going to hang with this devastatingly devilish dreamboat — he lives fast and furious.
5. The Art Kid
Every school has their very own Lady Gaga — the talented, paint-splattered genius who always has a pen stuck in his/her hair and a massive, secret project in the works. If you want to get down with your local Gaga, though, prepare to get messy. See above.
6. The Sensitive, Nice Guy
If you have an Ed Sheeran at your high school, snap him up post-haste — or become BFFs with him (even though he’s already totally BFFs and maybe secretly in love with the Nice Cheerleader). He’ll probably play you a song on his guitar.
7. The Class President
Like Kanye, your IRL high school prez has all the answers — and he probably doesn’t want to hang with you. He’s already chilling with college kids — nice try.
Brenna Ehrlich
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