Sky Ferreira‘s “I Blame Myself” might be inspired by a particularly quiet period in her life, but the music video for the jam is anything but subdued. Ferreira plays a kind of crime kingpin — one that won’t take her arrest lying down.
“The second verse is based off of something that happened to me when I was like 10 years old,” Ferreira says of the jam and the lyric “10 years old without a voice.” “I went through some weird thing where I just stopped talking for two years. I was like, ‘I have nothing to say anymore, so I’m not going to talk anymore.'”
“Sometimes I feel the same way. It’s like, ‘I should just stop talking because no one’s listening to me,'” she added. “I’ve had a really big year and a lot of ups and downs and stuff and I think that sort of sums it all up in some way.”
Ferreira’s debut studio album Night Time, My Time dropped in 2013, earning her some pretty solid press as well as a spot on Miley Cyrus’ Bangerz tour.
The video mirrors, in some ways, Ferreira’s battle with power, attention and the criticism that it can engender. That sentiment is also incarnate in the song, coming through in lyrics such as, “How could you know what it feels like to fight the hounds of hell?/You think you know me so well.”
The video kicks off with what appear to be two warring dealers of some sort, one of which calls for backup after a mild altercation. We then see a hooded, imposing figure from behind, striding onto the scene — before the camera pans down to show heels and tights and, finally, Ferreira’s face.
Soon, it becomes clear that the singer is in charge here as she authoritatively talks to her cronies, leads them in a pretty amazing choreographed dance routine and, finally, gets arrested for her sins. (Naturally, though, she escapes.)
“It’s obviously based off of real events,” Ferreira said in a behind-the-scenes video. “People always ask me questions about certain things, and it’s kind of like my response. I think actions speak louder than words.”
Inspired by early ’90s gangster rap videos and shot in Compton, “I Blame Myself” was directed by Grant Singer but conceptualized, according to Ferreira, largely by the singer herself.
Check it out over at SSENSE now.
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