OK, everyone, don’t freak out, but Rihanna has a new pair of jean shorts and she’s very into them. She’s so into them, she’s wore them multiple times in the past few days. She’s just like us, you guys. As if we didn’t already love her the most, she goes and proves that like any plebeian, when she has a piece of clothing she likes, she wears it whenever possible. In order to full appreciate this sacred pair of shorts, we need to take a closer look, right?
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Things kicked off three days ago, when we were first introduced to the jorts. TBH, when we first saw this picture we were too distracted by her two bags–they’re both baby colored, somehow? Baby pink and baby blue? Also, that redhead guy’s face–please keep your eye on all faces around Rihanna at all times. They’re incredible.
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After seeing this side-shot, though, we knew these were no ordinary denim shorts. For one: they’re split up the seam and feature grommets. Like most denim shorts, they look great with a crop top and sneakers.
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Just when we thought we had seen the end of these shorts, Rihanna wore them again last night. IDK if it’s because her Adidas x RUN DMC sweatshirt is bigger than her croptop, or if she went home and cut a few inches off the bottom, but they looked way shorter last night. Also, please briefly direct your attention to the faces of everyone else in this photo–especially the man all the way to the right.
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From behind, a new element is introduced: the butt slit. Seriously, how are these hanging from her body? How is the fabric connected? The science behind these things makes no sense, TBH. She’s downgraded to one bag, which she seems to prefer to hold behind her. Maybe she’s hiding another slit? Also, that child has the same face we would have, if Rihanna were to walk in front of us.
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Nope! There’s no other slit–Rih just likes holding her bag in a seemingly uncomfortable way. She swapped sneakers for stilettos and, unsurprisingly, pulls the shorts off just as effortlessly.
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When she’s preparing to sit (aside: hi, septum piercing!), the shorts creep up even higher to the point where the pockets sticking out.
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When she’s fully sitting, it appears she has no pants on at all. It wouldn’t be the first time Rih wore an Adidas sweatshirt without pants, just sayin’.
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But then, later in the night, when she’s turned her sweatshirt around, they appear again. Are we crazy, or do they seem shorter yet again? Are these incredible shrinking shorts? Is that why she likes them? If she wears them again and they’ve lose even more fabric, we’ll know the truth.
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